


knew your love before i kissed you

by oh_la_fraise



Series: drum it all away [5]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: M/M, Oral Sex, Sleepy Sex, Trans Character, discussions of past serious illness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-22
Updated: 2016-11-22
Packaged: 2018-09-01 11:11:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8622319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oh_la_fraise/pseuds/oh_la_fraise
Summary: Things hadn’t felt entirely real since Magnus finished his chemo and they’d had their impromptu courthouse wedding, but, in the sleepy, safe warmth of their dark bedroom, this felt utterly familiar and utterly right.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently in addition to NaNo I'm doing [ no shame November.](http://bootsselbst.tumblr.com/post/132553201503/no-shame-november-is-a-go) Title is from Lovesick by Banks.

“Alec. _Alec._ Alec!”

Alec blinked, slowly swimming towards consciousness.  The room was pitch black.  He was an incredibly heavy sleeper, and Magnus knew that.  The only reason his husband would wake Alec up in the middle of the night was if something was seriously wrong.

Like, _cancer_ wrong.

Alec shot up, suddenly wide awake as adrenaline flooded through his veins.As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he saw Magnus siting up beside him.From what Alec could see from the weak light filtering in from their window, Magnus seemed okay; he had been officially done with chemo a few weeks now, but his surgery site on his back was still healing—they weren’t out of the woods yet.His eyes flickered over Magnus’s body—not a heated, passionate look as he would have given Magnus in the past, but an attempt to see any signs of injury or pain, no matter how minor.

“Alec, _look_ ,” Magnus whispered, almost sounding giddy. 

Alec followed Magnus frantically waving hand down to his crotch.Magnus was just in a pair of boxers—he was normally a blanket hog, but the chemo made him hot at night—so it was easy to see his erection tenting the fabric. 

“Oh my god,” Alec whispered, just as excited.“Honey.”

“I _know._ I woke myself up humping the bed like a teenager. _”_

The chemo—among all of the other wonderful things it had done—had completely killed Magnus’s sex drive.Most of it was physical—whatever chemicals were in the chemo kept him from getting hard, but a lot of it had also been mental.Magnus had been nauseous and tired constantly, and, although the cancer hadn’t made him any less attractive in Alec’s eyes, Magnus had felt self conscious between the loss of his hair and his loss of muscle mass.Their relationship had always been incredibly physical—the night they’d met, Alec assumed Magnus would be a one night stand—and losing that aspect had been one of the harder things to deal with.Things hadn’t felt entirely real since Magnus finished his chemo and they’d had their impromptu courthouse wedding, but, in the sleepy, safe warmth of their dark bedroom, this felt utterly familiar and utterly right. 

Alec stroked Magnus’s thigh, tracing around his cock through the damp fabric.“What do you want?”

Magnus, who had thrown his head back in ecstasy at Alec’s light touch, whimpered.“Can you fuck me?Or can I fuck you?God, I don’t know, I want everything.”

Alec frowned, drawing his hand away so Magnus would focus.“Can you do that?With your back?”Magnus was still moving slowly, and most days he needed a cane to walk with.

“ _Fuck._ Probably not.It’s already hurting me, and I really don’t want to have to go to the ER and explain what I was doing to reopen it.”

Despite himself, Alec laughed, dropping his head onto Magnus’s shoulder.“It’s not funny,” Magnus grumbled, but he was clearly smiling as he said it.These days, they both felt so lucky to be alive that even the smallest of things seemed funny.

Alec raised his head, filtering through the possibilities in his mind.“I could blow you?”he asked.

Magnus shut his eyes, breathing deeply.“ _Oh my god._ I probably couldn’t return the favor, though.” 

Alec snorted.“I’ll survive.”More quietly, he said, “let me make you feel good.”It was a reversal of their position just a few months ago—Magnus had insisted that, even if he couldn’t have sex, he could still make Alec sure Alec was taken care of.Alec was more than happy to return the favor.

“Well, if you insist,” Magnus said, squirming down so he was lying more flat. 

Alec grinned, sliding between his spread legs.It was ridiculous, but for a minute he had to blink away tears.He was so, so grateful that Magnus was here with him.Magnus squirmed, and Alec drew all his attention to making his husband ( _husband!_ his brain squealed) feel good.

It seemed that Magnus’s libido had decided to make its return with a flourish.Magnus was fully hard, and there was a wet spot on his boxers from his leaking cock.Alec pressed his tongue flat to the wet spot, laving at Magnus’s cock.Even with the thin layer of cotton, rapidly getting soaked from Alec’s mouth, between them, he could still taste the salty, slightly bitter taste of Magnus’s pre-come. 

As Alec mouthed Magnus’s dick,Magnus threw his head back, moaning. It was such a beautiful sound, and one Alec hadn’t heard in much too long.His cunt was wet and throbbing already; he wished, selfishly, that Magnus was fully recovered so he could fuck Alec through the mattress.It’d been too long since he’d been fucked with anything but a dildo; he missed having Magnus’s heavy, thick cock inside him.

“Alec, baby, _please,”_ Magnus whimpered.

“Okay, okay,” he soothed.He pressed a kiss to Magnus’s thigh before slowly rolling down his boxers.His pubic hair was sparse and gone entirely in some places—Magnus’s head hadn’t been the only place to lose hair—but it just emphasized his hard, leaking cock that much more.Alec swiped his thumb over the head, gathering the pre-come, and slipped it into his mouth, tasting the salty flavor directly. 

Alec moaned; he had forgotten just how much he loved the taste of Magnus’s cock.The vibrations caused Magnus to arch with pleasure, his head thrown back and eyes shut.Alec quickly slipped all the way down Magnus’s cock until the head touched the back of his throat.He winced a little as he deep throated Magnus—Alec was out of practice—but it was worth it for the way Magnus whimpered, his hips giving tiny little thrusts he obviously couldn’t control.“Alec, Alec, sweetheart,” he babbled, hands scrabbling in Alec’s hair.The only time he didn’t call Alec Alexander was when he was really worked up.“I’m not going to last long.”

Alec patted his thigh clumsily in what he hoped conveyed a message of _that’s okay._ He pulled off Magnus’s dick slightly, pumping his hand over the base as he swirled his tongue on the thick vein underneath.Magnus’s back arched off the bed—so much for trying to avoid that trip to the doctor—and he came in Alec’s mouth.Alec sucked him through his orgasm, swallowing his come around his softening cock. 

Magnus’s head hit the pillow with a heavy thump.“Oh my god.”

Alec pulled off.“Good?” he asked, voice slightly hoarse.

“Good?”Magnus huffed.“I feel like I just lost my virginity all over again.” 

Alec chuckled, placing a kiss on Magnus’s thigh before pulling away and sliding back up the bed.He was still pretty horny himself, clit throbbing, but it seemed like too much effort to slide a hand down his pants and get himself off.Instead he curled up on Magnus’s bare chest. 

Magnus was yawning, clearly fighting sleep.“That was amazing,” he said wonderingly.“Thank you, Alexander.” 

“Anytime,” Alec said, kissing his shoulder.He was too tired to be sad, but he knew both of them would probably cry tomorrow when they were awake enough to realize the enormous milestone that had just happened.“I love you.”

“I love you too,” Magnus said.They drifted off to sleep together, utterly at peace. 


End file.
